Digestives are one of my favourite biscuits and I would happily eat these fruit ones if they were out on the table. I would also not notice for 12 years if they disappeared entirely. Shortbread. Somehow both underrated and extremely meh at the same time. Griffin’s doesn’t do it that well. Were toffee pops the sexy biscuit before Carlos Spencer in a bathrobe or did Carlos Spencer in a bathrobe make toffee pops the sexy biscuit? Somebody please tell me, I genuinely want to know. The only biscuit to pull off a genuine liquid caramel deserves all the recognition it gets. For reasons of hygiene and safety, personal grooming products, cosmetics or items of intimate clothing cannot be returned.

Make sure your toffee sauce is cool but runny enough to drizzle over the sides of both cake layers - use a large spoon and drip, or pour into a sauce bottle and go around the outsides. Ginger Ninja (I Love Baking), Gingernuts (Countdown), Finest Ginger Chunk (Pams), Gingernut (Baker Boys) , Ginger Nut (Arnott’s)Keep a very close eye on this sauce as it is easy to burn and a burnt toffee or caramel sauce isunsalvageable and not very nice. This biscuit shouldn’t work. It’s so thin, the icing is mostly flavourless, and hundreds and thousands are notoriously just colour, no flavour. So why are they so bloody yum? It almost makes me angry thinking about it. Recipe: Put one vanilla wine upside down on a plate, place three baking chocolate melts in a triangle formation on the vanilla wine, then place one marshmallow on top. Microwave for 10 seconds. Enjoy. The biggest surprise of this whole exercise was discovering Pams’ Finest range. This biscuit was great, against all odds. Flavoursome, plenty of chocolate, and soaks well in a hot drink. Turns out Pams know how to make good biscuits. So why, then, do they insist on making a bunch of shite ones too? And while I’m here, Pams has no apostrophe. If the brand isn’t named for someone named Pam then what the hell does Pams mean?!

A polarising biscuit. Ultimately very plain and I don’t really know what the flavours are supposed to be but sometimes not knowing is nice. This recipe makes 40 small biscuits, it seems like a lot but trust me you will want to make this amount as they will disappear in no time! Mine also lasted over a week and were still perfect. For the caramel you want to make sure you are using a soft chewy pre made caramel sweet you can buy in the shops, I will leave a picture of the ones I used. You don’t want to use a hard boiled caramel or a fudge as they won’t work. When searching for biscuits in the New World online shop and sorting by popularity, lowest to highest, this abomination was the first result. Griffin’s and Arnott’s each have their unique strengths but for some reason Griffin’s also tries to beat Arnott’s at their own game. Mint Treat, you’re never gonna be Mint Slice. Give it up.Scotch fingers are just shortbread that’s been to the gym. And that’s my scientific opinion. Chocolate scotch fingers are an incredible supper biscuit. The satisfaction of breaking the biscuit in two (like two fat chocolate fingers) to make incredible dipping implements is unmatched. But the real joy is that one biscuit transforms into two. You eat one scotch finger and think ‘should I have another? Is two biscuits too many?’ and then you look down and see that you’ve actually only eaten half a biscuit. It’s a modern miracle.